Category: Weeds

“Free Goat”

The second episode of Showtime’s “Weeds” starts out again at Agrestic Elementary School, where there is a dance rehearsal taking place.  The parents are watching the kids behind a glass window, all the while, gossiping.  The gossip this time, however, is centered on Celia Hodes’ husband sleeping with the Asian Tennis Pro.  I love when Nancy turns to them and says, “Ladies?  Throwing stones in a glass room?”  The other women blow it off by telling her it’s harmless fun.  Nancy doesn’t feel the same way, telling them they should chat about who THEIR husbands are “fucking.”   Those women are such two faced vipers.

Isabelle Hodes comes out of dance practice to see her mom, Celia waiting for her.  She seems confused…… apparently, their maid, Blanca was supposed to pick her up.  Isabella asks what is going on and finds out that her sister, Quinn has been shipped off to a boarding school in Mexico.  Guess Celia got her revenge for the video tape incident, LOLOL!

Nancy waits for Shane while he has Karate practice, but not before selling his instructor a bag of weed.  Shane comes out and loudly announces that the check Nancy wrote for his Karate lessons has bounced.  Embarassed, Nancy tries to quiet Shane down and assures him she will take care of it.  Unfortunately, Celia has heard the entire conversation.  Ugh…

Nancy is panicking.  She pays her CPA, Doug Wilson a visit.  She explains that she is broke and needs help.  Nancy tells Doug, “I started selling so I could maintain my lifestyle, not dismantle it.”  I’m thinking she hasn’t seen anything yet.  This is sooooo JUST the beginning.  Doug tells Nancy he has started the ball rolling on a cover up business to disguise her pot business.  This doesn’t make her feel any better.  And it also doesn’t help to get her cash so she can pick up more from Heylia.

Back at home, Nancy discovers some more unpleasantries… the phone and internet are shut off.  While having a conversation with Silas, Nancy lets it slip that Quinn has gone off to Mexico to a boarding school.  He does not take the news well, thinking that she may have tried to call him, but because the phones are shut off, she couldn’t reach him.  He gets angry and heads up to his room.  Lupita, the maid comes in and talks to Nancy about the fact that she has not paid her for last week.  She hurriedly hands her maid the cash…. cash she was going to use for the phone bill… or to pick up more weed, perhaps, but now there is no cash… now her problems are getting worse.

Shane is watching videos of him and his dad obsessively.  It’s very clear that the little boy misses his dad a lot, but with all the craziness going on around him… no one seems to notice.  Makes me feel bad for him, even if he is a bit creepy, LOL!  This also gives you a little peek into life before Judah Botwin died suddenly.

At the home of the unhappy Hodes, Dean and Celia prepare for bed.  Dean is babbling on and on about his day, while Celia just seethes with anger.  The more he talks the more livid she becomes.  He stands in front of the mirror, admiring his hairdo.  Dean very stupidly asks Celia if she thinks it’s okay for him to take two Ambien, telling her he really needs a good night’s sleep.  She replies, “I think you should take the whole bottle.”  LOLOL!  Like that wasn’t coming, right?  So, Dean goes ahead and takes two.  NOT the best decision he’s ever made.

Celia bides her time and waits.  Finally, she feels Dean is in a deep enough sleep and goes forward with her deviousness.  She picks up a pair of clippers and calls out to him to see if he answers.  When no sound comes from the bedroom, she goes inside………

Next morning, at breakfast, Isabella is staring at Dean’s bald head.  You can even see where his plugs were put in, it’s freakin’ hilarious!!!!!  Dean tries to sit there, reading his paper, as if nothing has happened.  Isabella asks, “Did your hair to go boarding school in Mexico too?”  LOVE IT!  Isabella actually turns out to be one of my favorite characters in addition to Heylia.  🙂  Dean looks over at Celia.  She’s staring him down… he puts a baseball hat on his head and quietly continues to read his paper.

At school, Silas finds Celia in the hallway putting up a sign and demands to know where Quinn is.  He assumes Celia shipped Quinn off because of his sexual relationship with her.  Celia informs him that “this is the first I am hearing of that you and my daughter had sex…”  Oops.  Silas let that cat out of the bag!  He still demands to know where she is, regardless of Celia’s anger.  Celia does not hesitate to inform Silas of the fact that Quinn was not in love with him, did not even try to contact him before leaving.  Poor Silas.  What a blow to find out you were merely an amusement for the girl you were in love with.  And, teenage love HURTS!  I sure as hell would never go back to that!

Heylia is playing a game of Dominoes with a friend of the family.  Nancy asks questions, trying to learn, but Heylia, in her usual way is a total smart ass about it.  Conrad tries to help by “translating.”   Everyone starts to then tease Conrad about his “bucket,” a car he’s been fixing up for a very long time.

Poor Conrad… he’s so defensive about his little beater, lol!  Heylia gets even cockier as she beats the family friend at the Dominoes.  The conversation rolls around to business.  Nancy asks Heylia what her “credit” policy is.  Heylia tells her, “This ain’t fuckin’ Macy’s, you get what you pay for!”  Nancy agrees to leave some collateral in order to get some more product from her.  Heylia asks for her car.  Nancy is incredulous, and really, really doesn’t want to, but she feels she has no choice.  Heylia trades her Conrad’s “bucket” for her Range Rover.  Nancy agrees.  Conrad begrudgingly gives the keys to his precious “bucket” while giving her instructions about how to take care of it.  Too funny!

Nancy pulls up to a light driving Conrad’s car and pulls along side a much nicer car with two guys in it.  They have some pretty loud, bumpin’ kind of music, and for whatever reason she thought she had to, she turns up her radio, which has this cheesy talk and music thing going on….. AWKWARD!!!!!!

Nancy heads over to Doug’s office, where the neighborhood guys are having a poker game, to drop off more marijuana.  Now that all the men spent their money on pot, they decide not to play poker, but to get high and make fun of Dean’s bald head, LOLOL!

Nancy heads outside to leave and spots Celia’s car right next to the hoopdee that she’s supposed to drive home.  She asks her what she’s doing and Celia asks the same.  Nancy covered up with a lie, but Celia tells her honestly that she followed Dean to the poker game.  Celia also admits that she’s aware of her husband’s affair, that there are no secrets in their town.  She also asks Nancy where her car is and Nancy once again lies to her, claiming not knowing where her car is.

Poor Silas.  He’s heartbroken and pouting on the couch when Nancy arrives back at the casa.  She asks Silas what’s wrong, but Lupita answers for him.  She tells Nancy that he’s been like that since he got home from school.

As per what we’re starting to find is the usual around the Botwin house, Shane is off in a corner by himself somewhere, once again watching the videos of his dad.

Nancy questions Silas again and tries to comfort him.  He confesses that Quinn never cared about him.  He’s angry and hurt.  He says, “My whole life, people just fucking go away.”  There is a loud crash and we hear Shane yelling, “MOM!  Ow, ow, ow!!!”   They can’t even call an ambulance, cause the phone is still dead.

They end up in the emergency room.  Shane gets a cast.  Nancy is waiting in line to pay for the ER visit, and of course, has to pay with cash.  She steps forward to pay, and a random guy says to her, “I know what you did.  I know you stole that goat.  Goat thief!”  The lady behind the counter tells him to back off and for obvious reasons, Nancy is a bit weirded out.  The man keeps going on anyways.  “I know, it’s the economy, stupid.  But that goat didn’t belong to you.  It was a free goat!”  Clearly, this man is off his rocker.  Nancy shakes her head in bewilderment.  Shane comes up to tell her his arm really hurts, it’s throbbing.  The man starts picking on Shane, mocking him and making fun of him.  Now Nancy gets pissed.  She tells him, “Back off, Nutty!”  The guys seems to quiet down for a second.  But then he starts up again, calling Shane a crybaby, making faces at him.  Nancy turns to face the guy and tells him, “I’m gonna take your free goat and shove it straight up your ass!”  This is priceless… the guy, immediately straightens up and with a deadpan serious look on his face says, “What goat?”

Back at Heylia’s, Nancy again is light on cash.  She asks her where the money is.  Nancy explains about having to pay for Shane’s broken arm.  This time, Heylia tells her it’s time to give up the “shiny bits.”  She also tells her “it’s just business, baby.”  Nancy listens to Conrad and Heylia daydream about what they want to do someday.. go to a tropical island.  Nancy very hesitantly removes her wedding rings.  She leaves them on the table for Heylia, takes the pot and abruptly leaves, I’m guessing, trying to get out of there before she loses the nerve to do it.  Vaneeta asks Heylia how much she thinks they can get for the ring.  Heylia tells her, “Nothin’.  She’ll be back.”

Celia pays a visit to the Tennis Pro.  Talk about your uncomfortable situations at work, eh?  The Tennis Pro knows she’s in deep crap.  And Celia makes no bones about starting right off with the nitty gritty details.  The Tennis Pro, not wanting to have a scene in front of everyone, suggests they go somewhere to talk and have a drink.  Celia agrees with the warning that she’s a mean drunk.  No kidding!  They discuss Dean, which only serves to get Celia more and more bitter and angry, not just about the affair, but the entire marriage.  It’s an uncomfortable situation, to say the very least.  The Tennis Pro does try to leave as soon as an opportunity is available, but Celia drags her back in for another drink.  CRAZY!

Driving back home, Nancy once again runs into Celia.  Celia doesn’t even notice that Nancy’s car is different, but she notices her ring is missing.  Celia is obviously very drunk, and Nancy lies as usual.

Nancy sits on her patio looking frustrated and scared.  She sees the video camera lying on the ground where Shane dropped it when he fell and she goes over and picks it up.  She turns it on to see what he’s been watching.  Of course, she sees the video of Judah, and is overcome with emotion.  She promptly smashes the video camera against the wall.   Shane comes outside to see what happened.  He picks up the broken video camera.  Nancy tells him quickly that it must have broken when he fell.  Shane just agrees with her, but I don’t think he buys it.  He carefully removes the DVD from the broken camera.

Celia and Dean are at home…. again preparing for bed.  She hands him an Ambien, which he very firmly says no to.  He’s rightfully suspicious, LOL!  He is not convinced she won’t do something else to get back at him.  To prove she’s on the level, she takes one.  He’s confused and scared, LOL!

The episode ends with Shane, having pieced the broken video camera back together and fixed it, is again watching videos of his dad.  It’s really a heartwrenching thing when you think about it, being that that’s the only sort of moving, real looking piece of memory he has left of Judah.

Will Nancy get her Range Rover or her wedding ring back?  Will Celia take more revenge on Doug?  I’m sure most of you know the answer since you’ve already watched it, but we can always discuss how we think things SHOULD have gone down!  Think about it, comment, discuss!

Check back next Wednesday for Episode 3, “Good Shit Lollipop”

*****Author’s note:  Pics for this post were taken from Weeds Wiki and were also pics that I took, believe it or not by just holding my camera up to the TV, LOLOL!  I apologize about the quality of some, but now you know why they look the way they do.  I just couldn’t find many images to use for this  episode, so I decided to make my own!  🙂


“You Can’t Miss the Bear”

In the pilot episode of Jenji Kohan’s “Weeds,” you are instantly given a look from the “outside” as to how the main characters in the series live.  The song, “Little Boxes,” plays while you see a sort of “Stepford” lifestyle being advertised in the opening credits.  In this case, “Stepfordville” is called Agrestic, California.

Opening scene is at Agrestic Elementary, where there is a PTA meeting taking place.  As newly widowed mother, Nancy Botwin and the community busy body and major antagonist, Celia Hodes debate over things such as water and fruit juice replacing sodas in the vending machines, the moms in the back of the room voraciously gossip about whether or not Nancy has had plastic surgery to ease her grief, and how much money her husband left her.  They don’t attempt to gossip quietly, and Nancy ends up overhearing part of their conversation as the meeting draws to a close.  The PTA ladies, of course, just try to lie their way out of being caught.  Cute.  Will some women EVER grow up?

Next, we find the grieving widow at… where else?  Her drug dealer’s house.  The home of Heylia James, a feisty older woman that could probably rip your lungs out with a spoon with a smile on her face.  She is quickly to become one of my favorite characters on the show.  She is a lady who makes no bones about saying what’s on her mind and it doesn’t matter who she’s saying it to.

Heylia and Nancy discuss her purse, and Nancy admits it’s a knock off.  Heylia says it’s not worth much, even being a knock off due to faulty stitching.  We learn two things about Heylia James right then and there… she is extremely observant and she is extremely mercenary.  I still like her.  🙂  Even after she calls Nancy a “dumb ass white bitch.”  Of course, what else is Nancy to do but take that with a grain of salt, right?

Amidst all the witty conversation, enter Conrad, Heylia’s nephew, and also friend of Nancy’s deceased husband’s brother Andy.  I can’t believe I just typed that, lol!  As the banter continues in the kitchen, Conrad takes a bag of marijuana from Heylia’s stash to get it ready for Nancy.  As Nancy glances over, she questions the weight of the bag, wondering out loud if it’s a bit light.  Heylia, proud woman that she is, does NOT take this lightly.  The look on her face says it all!  She tells Nancy, “Bitch, I can eyeball an ounce from outer space with my glasses cracked.”  She asks Conrad to hand her the bag.  Heylia throws the bag on the scale and it weighs exactly.  Nancy, obviously is feeling pretty sheepish right about now!  I nearly choked on my Sprite when Conrad tells Nancy, “You never question Heylia’s eyeballin’.  That’s the “Rainman” of weed right there!”  One of the funniest parts of this particular scene?  Nancy hands Heylia the money for her weed and it has a decorative little clip on it.  Heylia tells her, “Take that shit off of there… you ain’t giving me a gift, you are paying for your weed.”  You can take the girl out of the suburbs……

Next we meet Silas and Shane, Nancy’s two sons.  Family chaos and gossip about the neighborhood ensues, and Nancy finds out her son Silas is doing a lot more fooling around with his girlfriend than she is comfortable with.

Nancy goes out to “run some errands” aka drop some pot off to her customers, and gets a visit from one of the young neighbor kids, Josh, who also happens to be supplying pot to the good people of Agrestic.  He pleads with Nancy to sell him a cut of her marijuana, which she at first rejects.  Josh manages to talk her into it, she makes him promise not to sell to kids, and they part ways.

Next, we see Nancy at Shane’s soccer game, listening to Celia prattle on and on.  Not only do we come to realize the horrifying depths of Celia’s shallowness, but we discover her very misplaced self righteousness.  She insults her children, Nancy, and everyone else around her.  Nancy, all the while, is selling pot at the soccer game, unbeknownst to anyone else.

Meanwhile, Shane skins his knee during the game and grosses everyone out by proceeding to lick the blood off of his knee.  Shane no longer wants to play, but Nancy encourages him to keep playing.  Celia continues to lecture Nancy on how to raise her children, while being extremely abrasive, as seems to be her best talent.  During Celia’s ranting, she lets it slide that Josh is selling pot to kids…. after he promised Nancy he wouldn’t.

Shane gets into a confrontation with his teammate, which results in an ensuing chaos, which includes the boy calling Shane “orphan boy,” and Shane hurling cans of soda and bottles of water at his nemesis.  The boy runs after Shane and Nancy, seeing what is going on with her son and the other child, slyly trips the boy to buy Shane some time to get away.  Wow, don’t mess with her kids!

Silas and his girlfriend, Quinn, who happens to be Celia’s daughter, discuss having sex.  They are sick of waiting.   What teenager isn’t, right?  Shane runs by, interrupting the conversation.  He explains to Silas what happened with the other boy and Silas says, “You missed the bear.”  Shane realizes that he did not hit the boy in the “optimum kill zone” and he “missed the bear.”  It all comes from a TV show they love to watch together…. gotta love brotherly bonding.

Nancy goes to meet Doug at his van in order to get the money for what he bought from her.  During their conversation, she discovers that Dean, Celia’s husband is cheating on her.  They continue to gossip and the topic lands on Nancy’s dead husband.  It’s hard for her to talk about, so she just blows it off with wry humor.

She then runs into Josh in the parking lot and confronts him…. she loses the battle, much to her frustration.  Josh is clearly not one to play nice.  Nancy, Silas, Shane, and Quinn all promptly leave the soccer game.

Silas’ girlfriend Quinn decides to ask Nancy if they can have sex in her house.  Nancy, of course is distressed, and encourages Quinn to wait.  Quinn, is mature beyond her years and fairly jaded as well.  It’s clear that this is not going to be her first or last sexual experience with or without Nancy’s approval.

Quinn points out something she sees from the roof.  What’s going on?  Who’s that partying with a guy twice his age?  Oh, it’s Josh!  His father doesn’t know he’s gay and Nancy decides to use it against him so he will no longer sell to children.  Josh obviously agrees under the strain of being found out.

Celia pays Nancy a visit…. with a giant pink teddy bear.  It has a built in camera and she wants Nancy to place it in Silas’ room in order to spy on him and Quinn.  She asks Nancy to promise not to allow the kids to have sex in her house.  Nancy promises…. not under her roof.  Quinn notices the pink bear… it’s very clear that she knows what the bear is for.  She completely cons Celia into giving her the bear “for her room”.  Celia is only too happy to hand over the bear.  Too funny… can’t wait to see what will happen.

Next day, Shane jumps out of a tree at school and sprays pink paint all over his little enemy.  Not only does he get one over on the kid, but proceeds to call him “fuckwad” and get himself suspended.   Nancy comes home to find Silas and his girlfriend having sex in the guest room.  Quinn rationalizes the situation by explaining to Nancy that since they had sex under the broken skylight, they were technically “not under her roof.”  Like that is really going to make it better!  Life is really imploding on the poor widow.  She stops by Conrad and Heylia’s place and breaks down.  Conrad calls to Heylia to get Nancy a piece of pie, and of course in true Heylia fashion, she tells Conrad, “Tell the white woman to come in here and get her own damn pie!  Slave days is over!”

In Agrestic, Celia sits down to watch the video from Quinn’s room and finds an unexpected surprise.  It’s not Quinn, but her husband Dean having sex with the Asian tennis instructor.  She realizes her savvy daughter completely set her up and she is NOT pleased.. going so far as to say she “should have had an abortion” instead of having Quinn.  OUCH!  Some diabolical family drama!

All in all, this first episode of “Weeds” gets you hungry… or should I say…”jonesing” for more!  The cast alone is a crazy mix.. it’s like a train wreck at times, in the way that you are almost wincing for these characters, but you can NOT stop watching!

Stay tuned for Season 1, Episode 2.. “Free Goat”

**Author’s note** All pictures were found via Google Image search or via Weeds Wiki here:’t+Miss+the+Bear

Okay, dear readers, I have finally made some decisions about some upcoming topics for this page!

First, Mondays will now feature a biography of the week…. it’s just going to be random how I choose the person, unless I get some requests.  A friend of mine requested Mark Dayton, so I will be researching and featuring him at some point in the near future.  Extra snaps to the reader who can help me come up with a catchy “name” for my Monday Bio Feature of the Week!  🙂

Second thing I have decided…. I have chosen a series to write about from beginning to end.. it was also at the mention of a friend (SEE?  I take requests seriously, LOL!).  I will be doing a weekly feature on the Showtime series, “Weeds”.  I have decided that Nancy and her crew would be a hell of a lot of fun to write about, episode by episode.  I still plan on doing other series as well, but I think “Weeds” will be a great start!

Third thing I have decided is that I will be doing one other sort of feature and it’s going to be called, “Random Minnesota”.  I came up with this idea because although this state is horribly frigid a few months out of the year, I do truly love it here and could never think of anywhere else as home.  My mom raised us on a lot of knowledge out our very changeable state, and I want to share some things I learned and grew to love as a kid.  Having a sister that works for the DNR helps when I have a shortage of ideas, LOL!  Who knows?  Maybe I will have her as a guest on my blog sometime!  The basic purpose of this particular feature is going to be to show others who have never been here before what it’s really like to live here.  Maybe some are not interested and that’s fair.. but I do know that some people are incredibly curious about how in the world we even manage to go outside with all the cold and snow!  🙂

So there you have it, my friends, readers, passersby and curious onlookers.  Some decisions made and changes coming and I’m super excited to start my research!  Happy Wednesday!!!!

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